Mentoring Mommy

I have be come a Mommy Mentor. This is an incredibly scary thought on my part as I cannot fathom me, (the woman who is ok if her kid eats dirt (just a little), encourages her kids to fight (just a little) and can tune her kids out if necessary (a whole lot)) would be thought of by anyone as an appropriate mentor to anyone. The title is definitely an informal one but it is a role I have taken on none the less.

One of my friends who is only recently married and has recently moved over 1000 miles away from all friends and family other than me is pregnant with her first. Her and her husband are blissfully unaware of the riggers of parenting and are now looking at my husband and I for guidance. I am so excited for her, especially now that I get to go through everything all over again without the commitment of being the parent or pregnant one.

For the past few month I have been fielding pregnancy questions from her. You know, the basic "is this normal?" type of stuff. This past Thursday I got to have all sorts of fun helping her register. She asked me to come along because she didn't know what she needed or how to sort through all of the choices, "why are there so many different types of bottles?" "do I really need a diaper pail, can't I just use the regular garbage?"

Registering was great. I got to see all of the new stuff that was out. I know that my husband was hoping that it would give me the baby bug but I survived without catching that affliction. The other great thing about helping out this friend (other than the satisfaction of helping out someone who feels like she so needs it) is that it is causing me to remember things that I forgot long ago about my pregnancy and early days of parenting.

I am being cautious however. I want to make sure I don't over step my bounds and insert myself too much into the process. I try not to offer advice unless asked (or I see a desperate need for it). I would hate to have this ruin our friendship (it is a rather new one). I just see this as being great and for the moment she does too. I think all new mom's should be partnered with someone. Is there an organization that does that? I would join in a heart beat. I know in the past the pregnant woman's mom would do it but I see a need for it in today's society. Plus somethings are better heard from a friend than your mom.

What do you think, do we need a new mom's mentoring group? Is that what we are doing here on our blogs?

Advice Update

I wanted to update all of you on my friend I wrote about earlier this week.

I did send her an email (per your advice). She is doing OK now but had a rough patch. I knew that email was the way to go but it was nice to hear it from all of you. Anyways... She is fine, we are talking/emailing again.

Thanks to everyone who encouraged me to get in contact with her.

I need advice

I need some advice.

I was cruising around Facebook this morning and saw a comment by a former acquaintance from college. Her comment was (names changed to protect the innocent) " So glad that Jill and Tom's baby is going to be ok". Well Jill was a really close friend of mine in college. We lost touch after graduation when I got married and moved to a different state. We reconnected a few years later for her wedding but then lost touch again. I didn't even know she was pregnant/had a baby...

I want to reconnect, make sure everything is ok and catch up. I am not sure how to do it or if I even should. She is apparently going through some stress right now and I don't want to add to it or come across as a bottom feeder.

Any suggestions? She isn't on Facebook so I would have to try the cell number I have for her or email.